The sequence, and what each part needs
Week before
Aufruf
Synagogue coordination, small kiddush, limited guest list.
Day of
Ketubah signing
Officiant, witnesses named in advance, a quiet room, the document itself.
Day of
Bedeken
Timing between rooms, both families present, photographer briefed.
Day of
Chuppah
Chuppah structure and four pole holders, honors list, ring, glass.
Day of
Yichud and hora
Private room booked, band briefed on the hora, chairs cleared.
VENDORS THIS WEDDING BOOKS
TYPICAL BUDGET
$55k to $95k
For 150 to 200 guests. A kosher kitchen requirement is the single biggest swing factor on catering.
Plan this wedding in AyeDu
Understand
The events, in order
- Aufruf
- Ketubah signing
- Bedeken
- Chuppah
- Yichud and hora
Plan
Turn the rituals into a plan
Each event gets its own guest list, timeline and budget line.
Find
Vendors for Jewish weddings
Filtered by the traditions each vendor has worked, not just their category.
The calendar comes first
No weddings on Shabbat or festivals, and depending on movement the Omer, the Three Weeks and the Nine Days come off the calendar too: blackout periods that move against the civil calendar every year. Fix the date with the officiant before signing anything.
A Saturday-night wedding starts only after Shabbat ends, which pushes summer start times late. Check what that does to your venue’s hours before falling in love with a June Saturday.
Kosher is a venue decision, not a line item
A kosher caterer working a non-kosher venue has to kasher the kitchen first, and the supervising mashgiach typically holds the only key to that kitchen.
So the venue questions come before price: kitchen access from early morning, permission for open-flame kashering, and whether the caterer can hold the key.
Guest etiquette
Kippot are almost always provided at the door. Invitations often carry two times: kabbalat panim and the ceremony; be seated fifteen minutes before the ceremony if you want to see the bedeken.
Cash gifts traditionally come in multiples of 18, the numerical value of chai, life. At Orthodox weddings expect separate dancing divided by a mechitzah.
Where couples go wrong
Leaving the officiant to the end. Movement policy determines the ketubah text, the liturgy, and whether interfaith or co-officiated ceremonies are possible at all.
Choosing witnesses as an honor: in Orthodox practice close relatives are disqualified. And ordering the ketubah late, when a personalized piece runs up to five weeks in season.
Common questions
Jewish weddings, answered
A Jewish wedding centers on the ketubah signing, the bedeken, the ceremony under the chuppah, and yichud immediately afterwards, followed by the hora at the reception. Most of the planning is deciding who holds which honor, which is why the honors list belongs in the plan rather than the group chat.
What is a chuppah?
The chuppah is the canopy the couple stands under during the ceremony, open on all four sides as a symbol of a home open to guests. It can be a freestanding structure or held aloft on four poles by people the couple chooses. Confirm with the venue whether it can be anchored or must be hand-held.
What is a ketubah?
The ketubah is the marriage contract, signed before the ceremony by the couple and two witnesses who are named in advance. It sets out the obligations one spouse takes on toward the other. Many couples commission an illustrated ketubah and frame it afterwards, so order it months ahead of the date.
Why do they break a glass at a Jewish wedding?
The glass is broken at the end of the ceremony, traditionally understood as a remembrance of the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem, a moment of solemnity inside a celebration. It signals the end of the formal rite and the start of the party, which is why the hora usually follows immediately.
How long is a Jewish wedding ceremony?
The ceremony under the chuppah typically runs 20 to 40 minutes. The full day is longer: the ketubah signing and bedeken happen beforehand and need their own rooms and time, and yichud immediately afterwards takes another 15 to 20 minutes before the couple joins the reception.
What is yichud?
Yichud is a short period immediately after the ceremony when the couple withdraws alone together. Practically it is 15 to 20 minutes of quiet after a very public rite. It needs a booked room and a deliberate gap in the photography schedule.
Who holds the chuppah poles?
Pole holders are an honor, usually given to close friends or family members. Name them in advance. It is one of the most commonly forgotten assignments, and it is awkward to fill on the day. Four people are standard, and they stand for the full ceremony, so consider who can comfortably do that.
Does this apply to Reform and secular weddings too?
Practice differs substantially between Orthodox, Conservative, Reform and secular weddings, and couples routinely keep some elements and set others aside. This guide describes the fullest common sequence so you can choose from it. Your officiant is the right person to confirm what applies to your ceremony.